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Talk about toxic behavior

Confront a friend about their harmful behavior toward you or others.

the scenario
hardPersonalwith Quinn
try to:
  • Describe specific behaviors you observed
  • Explain how those behaviors make you feel
  • Say what you need from the relationship
  • Stay calm despite defensiveness
  • Make a clear request for change
rehearse this call in murmur
Before a call: the scenario 'ask boss for time off' with three things to try, while the call connects

How the call starts

In murmur, Quinn picks up. This is the first thing you hear.

them

What did you want to talk about? You seemed upset.

What to cover

  1. Describe specific behaviors you observed
  2. Explain how those behaviors make you feel
  3. Say what you need from the relationship
  4. Stay calm despite defensiveness
  5. Make a clear request for change

Write these down before you dial. Build a script for this call with your own details.

Rehearse it once first

Reading a checklist is the easy part. Saying it to someone who answers back is where calls go wrong. In murmur you make this call out loud, the other side reacts, and afterwards you see which of these goals you hit.

Download murmur on the App Store

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All calls

Rehearse the call before you dial

murmur is on the App Store, for iPhone.

Download murmur on the App Store
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